X-Rated Pin-up of Teacher Used in Card Game
Published August 1st, 199X
BALAMB GARDEN—Students at a local high school have allegedly been in possession of erotic material.
A group calling themselves "The Trepies" have been found to be sharing a custom card used in a popular card game. The card depicts Balamb Garden teacher Quistis Trepe in a suggestive pose.
"It is outrageous that this sort of material is being passed around in our children's school," said one student's mother. "I'm paying good money for my son to be trained to become a child soldier, and I don't want him getting distracted by half-naked women."
One teacher, who did not wish to be named, said that she was disgusted at the revelation that a fellow colleague was caught up in such a scandal. "We know what these cards are really used for," she said. "One of them had lipstick marks on it with the words 'To Rudiger, Love Q' on it."
Already, the teaching staff have confiscated fourteen cards, each one addressed to a different member of the Trepie Club.
However, in a shocking turn of events, it has been revealed that the school faculty team have actually started using the cards in Triple Triad combat. Headmaster Cid has been on an unprecedented winning streak.
When asked to comment, the headmaster said "While I don't condone the card and the picture of Ms. Trepe on it... it's got great starts. I haven't lost a match since I started using it!"